I've Turned 2!

And I rather be hanging out here instead of being at work, I'm having issues at work and I'm not sure if I want to continue being a massage therapist. It's starting to make me mad and very disappointed in this company it's more of my colleagues than the company. I work for Massage Envy at first I thought it was a really good job, after a while I'm not all that sure of how I really feel about this company, and they are based in AZ. And right now I'm having negative thoughts on how the location that I'm working at is not the greatest. I can not transfer out because they have already denied me of that, because I don't have issues with any of my co-workers I get along well with my clients that come in and see once in a while. I'm not even sure what is in store for me, whatever my future may hold may it be a positive out look and not what I'm doing now. I've learned a lot from working here not enough to get me out, they don't offer continuing education course which I have to look into for my insurance policy. Even then it's a lot of money to keep that up. Right now I'm sticking this out until we get our taxes done, if there is enough money for me to go back to school, any school I'm very seriously going to look at a different career path, one that I won't have to stress over.



Besides writing posts on just about every thing, any thing, and having a place that I can vent has really helped in a lot of ways, I and Ch haven't really fought since I started my blog just a little over a year ago. Sure we've had a few ups and downs, nothing for us to really fight about, how can we? When he works nights and I work during the day, we don't get to see one another all that much, except for dinner with all of us. Either I take dinner to him or I'll have him come home for dinner, it depends on what he's got going on. Or if C decides to throw a temper before we walk out the door to see Ch. Then I'll call him ask him if it's possable for you to come home? C's having a rough evening a temper more like it. I was once asked how I felt about him working evenings? My reply was he's not having issues with his co-workers that he use to work with, his hours may not be ideal for a family like ours, but at least I know he's much happier, sure he misses being home in the evenings, I know it's not what we would always want for now we manage pretty well.



Having to really look at where we have been, and what it's taken for us to get where we are today, just learning that every day is better than the last. Not taking each other for granted is one of the positive steps we have taken, not getting mad over the little stuff that comes up. Even when I happen to leave the laundry sitting on the couch because I'm exhausted from chasing C around the block or it's just been one of those lousy days at work and my head is pounding because someone wore way too much perfume the night before, oh I've had that happen boy stale perfume has an awful smell to it. Sorry if I've offended any of you, I can't wear any of it I'll break out into one massive sneeze fit, my eyes start itching, my nose comes all stuffed up. It's not fun.



Was it tough to write about any thing that I've posted this year? Looking back over my two years of posting many of my writings have been about love, life, and loss. Either way I know it's part of growing you can't change what has happened, but you can at least give yourself enough time and breathing room to coupe. It's not easy to do even in my line of work I have to be careful of how close I get with clients many of them have told they would cancel their memberships because I know what I'm doing. Which is a hard one to swallow, I feel that I would be letting them down, at the same time I know the stress that I've been under is not good. I also know that life is too short for mistakes, learning from them is a better climb to what is in store. I believe whole heartedly that paths will open when I least expect them to, in the meantime I will keep my head up thank god for the good things he has given me, be thankful for the family and friends that I have.

As for J's unkind neighborhood kid, he's finally getting the clue to stay away from each other. J doesn't want to be his friend because of the way he treats him, neighbor kid isn't the type of boy that he needs to be hanging out with. J sees him as a bad influence on C, which is good J doesn't like the way he treats other kids and teachers at school. We'll see what happens after fall break, they got out on Friday, I know here it is Sunday and I'm still working on this post; That's what happens when you've got so much going on and life seems to get in the way.

So what's next for my blog? I'm not really sure at the moment, I'm hoping to be able to post more positive outlooks maybe a little venting now and then. Or just being able to leave it open for suggestions, I wanted to be able to feel again, love again and laugh again. And you know I've done it all. I have become the person that I know I should be, very caring loving and a friend with open arms. Tonight I started baby sitting again, I've done it off and on over the years. And when I walked up to the gals apartment, we already knew one another. She couldn't believe it, here she thought oh no not another stranger! And when she turned around and saw me she was pretty relieved, I took her two youngest girls with me, brought them home. C had so much fun that he actually stayed put for the first time in months. What a blessing for both of us working mom's that know each other. I've known her oldest and middle child when I was working at the store I didn't know she had another little girl. I take them for a few hours that way her oldest will be able to get her chores and school work done, and I take the other two for a few hours a night. I'm glad to be doing something fun for a change instead of having to worry about work.

After working on this for a few days, due to so much activity going on. I'm able to look back and say I managed to get my life back in order, I was the one who found myself very sad, angry and wondering what the hell did I ever do to be treated without respect. Today I'm very happy, very much in love with the man that I married 13 1/2 yrs ago, with two loving boys that I'm proud to have. So Here's to those who say it can't be done, I say it can with lots of help, prayers and self respect. You can do just about anything that life throws at you. May I continue to grow in faith, love, and a woman that is full of life.