I'm still here just getting my schooling figured out, too much at once. I'm back to baby sitting tonight and trying to work on my paper for school, after losing power all day Friday and most of the morning on Saturday, I'm very behind in blogging and writing my paper. I'm not sure what to really think of going back to school, right now I'm feeling overwhelmed and under pressure since Friday. Due to the power being out, I couldn't look up any information for my paper. And today was the first day that I finally got the chance to find all kinds of reading for it.
So my question to you my readers, if I have any left since I started this blog two years ago. How do you cope when things are out of your hands? How late should I be staying up to get my work done. I'm not someone who likes to stay up late, and try to get up early, I like to get up and be on time for work, none the less my paper is due on Wednesday before class by 6 p.m. The only thing that is saving me right now is having Wednesday's off so I can do my work, correct any thing that needs to be corrected and send it off email wise. Every school is different, every teacher and subject are different. At least I'm feeling somewhat proud of going back to school, not many of us get such a chance, or we just aren't able to find time or the money to do so.
One of the hardest parts of returning back to school, is being away from J and C I'm always been there for them when they need something and now I'm not but I also know this is the best way of getting ahead. I'm tired of small paychecks and having to worry if I have enough tip money to pay on my truck payment. Taking this step was a big challenge for all of us, not knowing the outcome is a little scary. Many times I have wanted to call my guidance counselor and see if she had any ideas of how to get out of my job fast even though I just started school. It's not easy working on commission I don't get to make my own hours I have to be there when they say, and since I took vacation which isn't often my paycheck was very small 238.48 small. Then having it rubbed in my face by one of my co-workers that she took home $140.00 in tips last week, I felt very small and empty inside. I wanted to just walk out and never show up there again, I didn't need that, I didn't want to hear what I had missed out.
My family came first my nerves couldn't take much more, the whining, complaining of other therapist. And how that she seemed better than me, she doesn't have kids or a husband she doesn't know what it's like being a mom, or a wife for that matter she's 35 yrs old and still single, I can see why not very admired for what she's done in her life nor the fact that there is more to life than just going out drinking every other weekend or she has enough to spend. Hell it must be nice to live that kind of life! It was either spend some time with the family or work, you took what you needed; And missed out on the pay, not to mention that we had to turn clients away because we were so booked.
The only day that we were busy was on New Years eve, we are and always remain closed on New years day. I guess it was kind of selfish of me taking so much time off of work. I took the Christmas eve, the day after Christmas and Friday, Monday and went back to work on Thursday. I'm to the point I don't care any more about my job, I'm so sick of what is either being done, or being said about other people that I can't find a quiet spot for me to relax and focus on what is important to me. I'm praying that some how I will find a positive way out of my situation without feeling, that I'm letting my clients down by not being at work.
May this year bring me blessings and hope along my journey, to whatever lies ahead for me. And may the right doors be opened, may the one's that I've journeyed through be closed without me feeling guilty or hurt that I may find peace every thing that I do.
4 comments:
I hope you are finding comfort in your accomplishment in returning to school. It's a big step and an important one. It won't be easy, but will be well worth it.
As for time management, I take a very draconian approach. There is a certain amount of time. I prioritize what I need to do, give it an estimate for completion, and allocate that much time to the highest priority task. When it's done, I move on to task #2. When that's done, #3. If I can multi-task effectively, I do it, but don't let a lower priority impede a higher priority.
And when I run out of time, I stop. And having some time for you is a very high priority item. Just can't allocate a lot of time.
Sounds mechanical, but it works.
I hope you find the way to do what you need to get done and still find the joy you need in your life.
I don't think you have to feel bad about taking time away from the job, because you did so to do what was important to you. Spend time with your family. They're better than any paycheck or tips. I know that sounds cliche, and I know that the money situation can be daunting when it seems like things are caving in around you. I feel like that's the life we live weekly!
I commend you for going back to school. I've thought of it from time to time, but I'm hung up what I'd do. Plus, I've a tendency to get overwhelmed by even the smallest details, so I'm not sure I'm in the space, mentally or whatever, to do so!
I believe that the faith you have will help you find the calm in the storms when they brew up. That should always be close to you.
Thoughts with you all!
((S.R.))
You needed the time off and you took the time off.
My Grandma Golden always used to say that nobody lays on their death bed, wishing they worked more!
Don't think your co-worker is the one that's living the life worth living. I'm sure she has fun partying and whatnot...but she goes home to an empty house and eventually, even being in a bar full of people, one can feel pretty dang lonely...don't let her fool you. You have real happiness, not just passing happiness.
Congrats on going back to school.
Sadly, I have no words of wisdom on this subject other than to keep plugging away. LOL.
Love ya girl:)
D - this will help, working full time and going to school part time. I'll just have to take my computer back and fourth to work with me.
FADKOG - You are so right, my co-worker said she is one of those I have never cared to have kids or settle down. She has no idea what she is missing, going back to school I figured that would be better than trying to find a new job.
BBM - I have missed you terribly, Grandma Golden is very right. If we take work for granted we don't have much to give to those we love.
S.R.
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