Needing to Vent

Boy isn't that the truth! I'm getting to the point my job is not work my time or money. And I'm not talking aobut baby sitting either, at this point I would rather work with children. They may not like having some one tell them what to do, at least they don't find a way of getting you fired, and to all of my readers if I have any left; How the hell do you tell your supervisor that one of your co-workers are trying to get some one fired because she does not like him? I really HATE MY JOB!! It's not a fun place to work, it has became a place that I pretend that doesn't exsist but that is hard to do. Further more I am not their freaken MAID!! I do the work because no one will do it, the receptionist could careless about hot towels that we sometimes use. Hell if one more thing goes wrong between now and when I put in my two week notice in, I swear to God I'm going to sream. There is nothing worse than having to with some one who can't leave other people alone, the only reason why she leaves me alone because I'm just one that does what she wants and not talk to any one about anything. Hell my work is full of Bull shit, I was asked for my insurance I told her that I would bring it in. Hell I should just hand her a two week notice along with my insurance and see what they say.

I'm pretty sure they would be better off without me, they don't need me for anything, except to work on their so called clients I'm so wanting to throw in the towel and just give them what they want, for me to quit. I'm not settling for them to win me back so they can offer me more money they should have done that from the very beginning, in the past six weeks my tips have been 5 to 15.00 tips. No 20.00 like I got back in the fall and winter, Ch was not pleased counting out what I have made in two weeks, as the saying goes good things comes to those who paitiently wait. I believe that whole heartedly, I know it's not easy on him. At least we make each other smile even on bad days. It may not be easy for me being here by myself, at least all the doors are locked, both boys are in bed, and my homework for this week is done. Tomorrow night is school. On thursday I'll start my next homework assignment, that way if I have nothing to do at work I can take my lap top and note pad start on my next assignment, even though I don't have internet access I can start putting ideas down on paper, then transfer it over to the computer.

Ch's work will be getting another lead worker to the crew, which is great. That way I can finally have my hubby home in the evenings for two months of days, then two months of nights. Which will be a lot easier on me and the boys. That way when I've got a major assignment I can get it done without being bugged every so often of MOOM!! C is hitting me again or J won't let me have a game or whatever the case may be. At least we will have our evenings back again, I haven't really thought about getting another job after quitting this one, I'm pretty happy of child sitting and going to school, my main focus is getting through everything with paitence, faith and happiness. Sure I'm stressed out right now it's not easy having to deal with work, kids and school at least it's not like I'm not getting paid. Tomorrow I will finally get paid for all the hard work I've been doing. The only commute I will have is to school, shopping and doctor appointments, that I've neglected to make for myself.

I have found something in my eye I'm not sure what it is, I thought it was a piece of fuzz flooting around in my eye, so I took a q-tip to it, I found it's part of my eye where the blood vessels are. I have worn glasses since my first year of high school, so I know that this not normal. I'm closely watching my eye for any discoloration, or any type of loss of vission. I know I should not wait, when there is no money and my children have been going through growing spurts lately I have to put my needs asside. I have told Ch about it, there is nothing we can do about it at the moment, my eyes and my whole well being is very important to me. For now I'm going to wade this out for a little while. I know I shouldn't when there is hardly any money I can not afford to not items that are needed such as gas, food and whatever else we tend to run out of before our next paychecks. At least we have eachother, family is important to us, we have been invited out to dinner on Saturday with Ch's parents for dad in laws birthday, I told Ch that we should go. I'm praying that my work picks up on Thursday and friday, that way we can go out to dinner with them.

I have been up early this morning, I came home from work not feeling well. Ch just pulled up 4:45 comes mighty early I need my sleep. May you all have a good week.