I Give UP!!!!

I'm in a very pissy mood tonight, and it doesn't help that my pay also sucks! I'm to the point of selling my soul to the devil. Any one interested? I've had my fair share of running head to head with a boss that doesn't care how the hell you get treated, only to please clients give me a break will ya! She could go back wherever the hell she came from, because Cali don't need someone as rotten as her! I'm sorry when it comes to min. Wages such as $6.75 and your not getting paid what your worth you might as well quit while your ahead. And yes I'm still looking for a new job either that, or stick it out until I can afford renting my own space. And that's where I'm running into a brick wall. One I don't have enough money or the clientele to actually start my own business. Two I was hoping to wait a few years, before I went on that path just to make sure I had enough money to start up my own business.

So that's where I'm at, stuck between a wall and a rock. Just great!! And we just got one more expensive bill to pay. Just what I wasn't looking forward to. Oh and another thing I need to get my trany in my suv serviced the transmission fluid is turning a purpleish color any darker and it will need to be done sooner than December. Can it get any worse? I hope the hell not! Because if it does I will be punching something. As far as I'm concerned we either need to find a transfer or I really need to be finding a new profession. Any ideas?

Tuesday 10-17
Here's my pet peeves about working out of town, one traffic two the doctors that CH goes to is on the other side of town. So today being the loving wife that I am, after work I head over to the doc's to pick up his prescription. Mind you I'm not the best in parking side to side with two cars on each side of me, I'm so use to backing up and parking. Today of all days, I had to go it was busy. Of course they are doing construction work and I have to go around to get to the entrance. Pulling into the parking lot was simple finding a place to park wasn't so simple while driving very slowly, and watching other cars make fouls of themselves. I've stopped just to see if this car was either going to turn or go forward, what does she end up doing? Hitting me in left side of my bumper she motions me to follower her so we can exchange insurance, and all that good stuff, she then has the nerve of say well it's your fault! And Oh your husbands name is on this suv!?! Excuse the living hell out of me! I said in a very nice tone of voice yes I drive this. And the insurance is in both of our names. I help pay the fing bills just like every working mother out there. Of course I didn't say all those words. I wasn't upset like she was and I was very calm a little shaken up. All I could think of is Oh My God I've been hit! And she is telling me it's my fault? Sorry lady but your bumper marks and tire marks are on my suv. If it were me, that hit her the damage would have been a lot worse.

Make matters even more worse, CH tells me if it was you that hit her well there goes our insurance, just great something else to add to our finance difficulties, not that there is much of one at the moment then again, I still don't have a retirement. So when I got home, I called my insurance back after they had called the house, and this is before I got home and done loving wife good deed of picking up the med. I call our insurance tell them exactly what happen even went to the extent of taking a pic. Now since I'm pretty new to using a camera phone haven't gotten use to saving pictures on it yet. The picture that I did take, I didn't save it and now it's no where to be found! I told the rep. What had happened told him if I was the one that hit her I would've done more damage than just a baseball size dent in her car. As I looked closer her tire marks are on my suv and so is her bra marks from her car is on my suv. If I had hit her with my suv would not be drivable, I've seen what people have done to their auto's. She was coming from my left side, and I was in front. If she was paying attention to her driving instead of her cigarette and turn signal she would have seen I was sitting there waiting for her to make up her blasted mind!

As of right now I'm not doing all that great, I've got one more thing on my mind that keeps playing like a broken record. Not a good thing right now I threw away half of my dinner away tonight and ended up finally crying over this situation. And her telling me it's my fault! When I've got the proof on my suv that it wasn't. The rep asked me if I needed a rental for the dents in my suv? I politely said no I don't it's had it's fair share of dents and other objects thrown it's way. I don't need any repairs. I'm sure the lady in her car will want hers done. Mine just needs a good washing, :D.

To me it's just a auto, I know it can be replaced. Us humans are not replaceable, it's nothing to get mad about it's fixable. She just didn't catch on that I wasn't up set, pissy or in a stark raving, anger fist fighting b@$%# mood. I was very nice, the whole time. She just didn't seem to freaken care, just goes to show that some people care about their f'ing cars than their freaken life!! give me a break! I've got family that cares about me and friends that depend on me, when things seem so out of touch. I go to the one with an open heart and mind, and even though it's been hard to find time to read his word, I know he's always watching me. And if she thinks that I'm a bad driver or younger than what I look so be it! Her marks are on my truck as proof she did it! And I watch her do it! I forgive her for what her thoughts maybe of me. At least no one got hurt, just a little shaken up from it.

I will leave you all with this thought:
One of the most wonderful things about
knowing God is that there's always so much
more to know, so much more to discover.
Just when we least expect it. He intrudes
into our neat and tidy notions about who
He is and how He works.
Joni Eareckson Tada