Rain, Rain Please go away!!

As you can tell, by the title it's still freaken raining. I would rather be fishing instead of being inside with our boys for the week, and the wind has been up today along with thunder and lightening I won't go out when it's like this. On top of that I feel very uneasy, I had to pay out another $115.00 to get my truck fixed again! Last night coming home from work my head lights were working until I pulled unto the high way on my way home, while pulling out of work I noticed a police officer had stopped someone so I also know the my d.l. expire this weekend (still not saying)when or what day. As I'm driving my headlights quit nothing I did would make them turn on, by this time I'm a little shaky I've never had this happen before, so I turn off the main road to go home on I called CH. Explained to him what was going on I felt really unsafe I know I'm not too far from home but still, being out there with no one around except a locked up suv. Of course I had a police officer come up behind me and asked if I needed help? I told her that my husband was on his way to help me get home, I wasn't about to move then have her give me a fix it ticket. I've been blessed not getting one of those. I've only had warnings, which is a good thing we can't afford any tickets right now and the way things are going I don't even want to think about this weekend, which has put me in a mood. Sure my sister is here for the two weeks but I can't seem to think that is any better, we've already had a little bit of a disagreement. On top of that I found another lump in left breast again! And no I'm not having it checked at the moment I'm going to let this one slid for a while and the place that I have located it is between two of my bloodvens not exactly a spot where I want one. I know that my estrogen level is up again, I will continue to work out eat healthy foods stay away from any thing that is not. If I find any discharge then I will go in, I haven't told my boss nor am I willing to lose what I've worked so hard in getting. I'm not willing to take any time off of work for this one, unless there is too much pain for me to handle. I'm keeping this one under wraps from my family and CH's I don't want any one to worry over me. It's more than likely another Fiberistic lump, if I get it checked out they will do another biopsy and another mammogram (which by the way hurts). I'm not sure what to do yet, as I was checking a few minutes ago I believe I found one underneath my breast I'll have CH take a look at it after I'm done, writing this post. Sure I feel sad there is nothing I can do. I work out, I do drink lots of water, I try to remember to have a glass of milk, I don't know what else to do. I have heard of soy tablets which helps regulate the body, as soon as I get a chance I will do some research on soy to see if it could help me. In the meantime I'm trying my best not to let this get to me. I want cry but I can't I want to say why me? I already know the answer, I'm not the first person to go through this. I'm not sure what we will do leave it or have removed again, whatever we decide to do it will have to require more time off of work and leaving me without a paycheck. Not exactly what I'm looking forward to, neither one of us has much vacation time. I'm one of those who hates laying in bed I need to be up running around with my head chopped off at times. It's three days before my birthday I'll be turning 31 over the weekend I'm hoping to post something other than what I'm writing right now. By the way today was the first day that we have seen the sun let me just say I would have loved to be outside today in a pair of shorts. I had two clients today so, I had to work. And my sister is here with us, so it's kind of fun having her here with me. We even talked about what she wants to do next year, she's very seriously thinking about joining the Army I'm hoping she does, she needs direction I can't give it to her, she needs to find it for herself. I'm all for it, I'm hoping she can. It would make life for her so much better, I can support her in this, rather than having her not working or trying to find love. Which she wants so badly, (Now guy's don't get any ideas). She's turning 26. And lives here in Cali. So I've taken up so much time as it is I need to finish dinner. Have a good weekend, by the way it's taken me three days to do this post.