A Year Already?!?

I can't believe it's been one year. When I started writing I thought it would be for a short period of time, not realizing it would be for a year. Some of you have followed over from CH who started writing about our problems, and a few of our family adventures. I have to honestly say we both have grown in ways, that married couples are to grow when they first get married and not really in the middle ahah! I've also had fun reading different blogs along my path of blogging, who have either got me to laugh or to cry. I know I've done the same with many of you.

To really say which one out of my 78 posts have I come to really enjoy writing or which one's that CH had really take a good look at himself? One of my favorites was the romantic weekend one. I had a fun time writing it, then again it took me all morning which kind of blew our day out of the water. For me to actually go back and say you know I've come along way, since the pain and hurt. To finally have a release of the hurt, tears, and the heartfelt pain that I had experienced it wasn't easy to write about. There where times when I wanted to delete the hurtful posts, that I didn't want it read by any one. Part of me just wanted someone out there to read, to listen to what I had dealt with, there also times when I needed to take a break from writing, I wasn't sure on what to write about or how it would come out. There were also moments that I felt that neither my heart or my feelings were working together. I knew that was when I needed to take few moments to get back into what I was missing.

Then there was the weekend not too long ago, our cable was out for about 12 hours. We had picked up some games for the boys called Klutz kwiz Gizmo, we would take turns to see who knew the answer to the question. We don't have the gizmo to tell you the answer but it was fun having both boys figure out the answer by using their brains. C got really good at answering some of the math problems, he's a smart little guy even though he has a few issues. I'm very blessed to be J's and C's mother, and CH's loving wife. And after putting the boys to bed, having CH get a box of letters out of a plastic box that we have stored him reading a few of his letters that he wrote to me. He felt upset, sad, and hurt that he wrote such letters to me. I may have read the letter once, and forgot that CH had said some pretty awful things to me. I don't think I ever showed them to anyone, they stayed in the box along with some old cards from birthdays, and other in between holidays.

When CH had first brought up writing, about my feelings on here it wasn't easy I wasn't sure how he was going deal with my sharp words or the hurt that I felt from long ago. It's a pure blessing for me to see CH in a different light, not so much of a dark tone that he use to use with me, one that is more loving more caring. At times I wish he had done this sooner, get the help he needed. At least now he knows what I have been through with him in the past.

To look forward to a future that is now brighter, than it has been in a long time. To know that I'm still the same loving wife that I've always been. My faith is much more deeper than it has been when we first got together, I think in some ways that has helped. I'm so glad that he is now seeking help that he needs for his emotions to finally say yes I have a problem of being in control over my wife, looking at my point of view of how he had dealt with me in the past.

I'm sure there is more that I wanted to add to this post, right now I'm feeling very tired. Many of you may know what it's like getting up earlier than your spouse and know it's not easy staying up and trying to finish a project up when your falling asleep.

In turn I wish each of my readers a very good week, may your days be filled with laughter, warm hearts, peace and love.