Very Tired

Yes it's true I'm very tired, after the two days of a nightmare that I would never would expect C to even think of doing and saying; It's just amazing that I even made it home from work on Monday afternoon. We've seen C at his worse, nothing like this, I don't think that any one is ever prepared for this kind of behavior. I'm not even sure what I'm feeling at the moment, it's a lot of numbness that I'm feeling or whether it's I'm just very tired from the last two days. It's one thing of not getting answers and another of having us being told that were at fault and that we are the one's who are putting these kinds of thoughts into our son's head. Which in turn we did file a formal complaint this morning, and my call to the number that is located on the back of the card, is when they did call us back. Ch was on the phone with Kaiser when I arrived home. I was told by my supervisor that I was to turn around, and go home we weren't busy enough and that today would be fine. She told she is expecting me to be there at work; I have at least three clients tomorrow morning.

I explained to her that I can't afford to lose my job, Angela (Not her real name)...said that wouldn't happen she promise me this right then and there, I can't believe my supervisor would go to such lengths as to say that my job will be there tomorrow, that my family is to come first. This is what I call a blessing to have a caring person to work and stand beside their employee's. I made a call to C's regular doctor this morning Ch was not too thrilled he thought I was changing doctors on C. I said No I'm not, I've worked too hard too long to find the right doctor that will actually listen to what I have to say. And if I have any questions that he would not walk out of the room with out giving me an answer. C loves his doctor, I can't change him now. And have to go through the process of finding a doc. like this one. I don't think so! I'm staying in the East bay for J and C's medical care. The rest I'll move my child from.

And so today we did just that, C has an appointment not too far from where I work. C will be out of school until we see this new counselor starting tomorrow morning at 10 a.m. The end results of the doctors appointment this evening was, getting C's blood tested a third time, poor child Ch was the bad guy, I was the good guy took C out to dinner. The doctor is looking for a chromosome called fragile X, it's something to do with the size of the child's head. And usually children with this has a more of a long face to them, in C's case his head is not. The doc also sent another referral to the Autism center near San Jose, and see if they can give us a second oppion the first one doesn't make any sense at all.

We have to wait a week for the blood test to come back, I even went as far asking about a brain scan doc said that wouldn't really give us any clear cut answers because C is still growing and it wouldn't give us any answers to what the problem is. I did the right thing took C back to his pediatrician to have him look at C a little more closely, and he even agrees with us, that the Mental Health Center is wrong. That we have been looking for the right answer since C was 4 yrs old. And he is now 6 yrs old, he is getting stronger every day and has one powerful kick to him. My bruises have healed, C's temperament is at a crises stage, and finding what is making him tick is what we are looking for.

I want to thank each and every one of you, for your prayers well wishes and continued support for us. I would write more I'm very exhausted, I've made two calls tonight, we are very blessed to have meet the right people, from the church that I attend. Without their support in the last two days I don't think I would be able to get through today. We still have a long way to go, and our prayer is that the tests come back with something to go on, that the new counselor will be able to help us. In getting down to what is making C tick.

Until next time Good Night.